My running career had a spectacularly inauspicious start. After three and a half years at home with the children I’d been mulling over the idea of it for a while without actually committing. I finally bit the bullet when we had some friends to stay, one of whom was a very experienced runner who offered to go out with me on the Sunday morning. So off I went, slow, unfit, sleep deprived at the best of times and hungover after a late night to boot. I ran (ish) for 20 minutes, covering about 1.5 miles, and was so broken by the end of it I was ill for a week.
I’m still fairly amazed that that wasn’t both the start and end of it, but I was so desperate to get some time alone that a couple of weeks later I went out again. And this time I wasn’t broken. So I went again a few days later. And again a few days after that. Slowly, very slowly, I started to realise that I felt better after a run, even when I really didn’t fancy it. But still the runs were short, 2 miles then eventually three, until a couple of years in when my youngest went to meithrin (nursery) and I started to have some real chunks of time to myself. Could I actually make it all the way round Cardiff Bay, a little over 5 miles?
Unlike my usual routes, there was no easy way from home from this one. If I found myself broken on the far side of the barrage I would simply have to walk back along the route I’d hoped to run. So much of running is confidence, and mine was very, very low. I might have got back out there after my disastrous first attempt, but the spectre of being broken still haunted me. How could I do a school run and look after two little boys if I exhausted myself by running too far?
The final push came in the form of some slight of hand by my husband. I asked if he could pick up if I ran half way, which he was happy to do, and arranged to meet me in the car park on the Penarth side. Only afterwards did he tell me that what I’d actually done was run the long half of the route. In truth there isn’t a great deal in it, but that comment was enough to give that final little bit of confidence, and a week later off I went for a full loop.
Several years and many miles later it is still my go to for a quick clear my head run. The sight, sound and smell of the sea on one side, and the calm stillness of Cardiff Bay on the other, is a balm like no other. As is the memory of having to work so hard to get there, of the elation I felt when I achieved that first goal, and of starting to understand just how far a bit of confidence and determination could get me.
I Run Free 